[Dashe] God please, don't take the girl.

[Anthony Lovasz]

Parents screaming, babies crying, older siblings ushering out the younger children, clopping hooves, shouting trainers, seasoned jockeys degrading calls, “how would you like the opportunity to ride for me in the United States?” the eerie silence, the snorting horses, the clanging bell, the clash of gates being thrown open, the thudding hooves in a steady rhythmic beat, creaking leather, bone crashing against bone, the roar of the crowd, the crack of wood shattering and bone breaking, the groan of the massive beast, the frenzied voices, the deafening silence, the steady shrill pulse of machines, “I love you,” the bridal march, the steady hand on his shoulder and the whispered “keep breathing” from the best man, “I do,” breathless anticipation , “I now pronounce you man and wife,” the recessional, “I’m pregnant,” the faint but distinct heart beat, “it’s a boy,” 24 hour grocery store check stands beeping at 1 in the morning, “the baby is coming” frantic doctors and nurses, the swinging ER doors closing, silence, the ticking of the clock…

There were few things in this life that any man would ever remember, especially when it came to simple things like the words said at a particular moment or the check stands at the 24 hour store… but then again, Anthony Lovasz wasn’t just any man. Most men, as was scientifically proven, didn’t pay that much attention to details… but Anthony Lovasz wasn’t most men. He was far more thoughtful, far more considerate, far more detail oriented than probably 90% of the men in this country. Maybe it was because of his hard upbringing, maybe it was the careful training to be a jockey, maybe it was the need to know everything and more about the horses he rode, and maybe it was just because he was one of a dying breed of men… one who didn’t put the sexual desires on his mind before the woman whose hand held his heart.

If there ever was a model human being, Anthony was it. He had his problems, yes, but his never ending struggle and fight to overcome instead of succumbing to them was what elevated him above the rest. Yes, he was born with a genetic drug dependence, yes, it would be far easier to just allow himself to become an addict, yes, it would be far less painful… but Anthony wasn’t one to give up and just go with the flow. He was the sort of man who embodied chivalry; he was the sort of man who never put himself first. He stopped to open doors for other people, he listened more than he spoke, he put himself through hell so that others could have an easy walk on the high road… everything that was desirable about personality traits… he had it. How he came to be this way was a mystery. He had every right to complain, he had every right to say no, he had every right to take the easy way out… but for whatever reason, he never did.

When he met Alex Chasse, he never would have guessed that within 24 hours of her first statement, “I’m Alex, you should really get that looked at” he would be telling her he loved her… and he never would have guessed that within six months of telling her that he would be standing in a field asking her to marry him, and he never would have guessed that within a year of her saying yes, that he would be at the altar saying “I do” and he never ever would have guessed that within three months of her name changing to Alex Lovasz she would be telling him that he was going to be a dad. In two years he went from a single man who was married to the track to being a married man with a baby on the way. Honestly… it scared him to death.

Things changed a lot. I know people generally say that when you live with someone before you marry them, marriage doesn’t make much difference… but to Anthony, it made all the difference in the world. Waking up every morning to Alex Lovasz was something totally different from waking up every morning to Alex Chasse. People always told horror stories about what happens after you get married… but Anthony had yet to experience any of them. He loved her, and she loved him… they were the perfect love story, and if anyone ever got their hands on their story, their lives would soon be lighting up the silver screen and captivating audiences everywhere. It was hard to believe, but it was true. They were perfect for each other.

Of course, when Alex told him she was pregnant, the poor guy was shocked into silence. There had been no other women before Alex. Sure, there was that girl he had fallen in love with years before who had passed on… but the love for her had never lead to this. Yes, he had planned on asking that girl to marry him… but he’d never had the chance… and when Alex said “I do” he knew there was a good reason that chance hadn’t come years before. So, as you can imagine, for someone like Anthony, who went nearly 22 years resisting the temptation to give in to those lustful desires that all men face, to go from that to “soon to be dad” in three months… it was a little overwhelming. Not that he didn’t want to, and not that he didn’t want kids… it was just all happening so fast, he felt a little like his world was spinning out of control on a collision course for destruction.

After the initial shock wore off… some 24 hours later… he wasn’t quite sure what to think. He was excited, yes, but what the hell did he know about babies? Sure, there was Tyler’s daughter who Alex was the custodian of, but raising someone else’s child was totally different from having your own. Alex was Ale’s mother figure, yes… but Anthony would never consider himself or be considered anything like her dad. Tyler was her dad, end of story. Certainly, if Tyler had left or had died, Anthony would have readily taken on the task of being the father figure for the baby girl, but he was going to stand back from that role and let Tyler step up to the plate. Now he was having his own child… and his role would completely change forever. He wasn’t just a husband now… he was a dad too… and there was a hell of a lot more responsibility involved in playing both roles as there was in just the first of the two.

Nine months, at times, seemed to fly by… but every time he was standing at the cashier’s stand getting whatever it was he needed to satisfy Alex’s cravings… nine months seemed like an eternity that would never come to an end. Of course, were it up to him, Alex would have spent those nine months not working and at least the last of them in the hospital, despite how much he hated the place… but Alex was possibly the most stubborn person on the face of the earth, and he knew better than to argue with her. So when she insisted that her work continue as usual, he didn’t put up much of a fight. He protested regularly, but he knew it would never get him anywhere. With anyone else he might argue, but not with Alex.

Today started out just like any other day. Up at the crack of dawn and out to the barn before the sun. It was one of those days when every one of the horses was to be given a long hard workout. Doubt went first… as usual, since he took way more energy to manage than King did… and it went surprisingly well. Of course, as always, the spicy little gray gelding managed to unseat Anthony at least twice… and that was no easy task. Anthony had been riding for at least 12 years now, and he was one hell of a rider. Landing him in the dirt took a horse with a lot of oomph and a knack for the element of surprise… Doubt was just that horse. Thankfully, he managed to avoid landing on his right shoulder each time, and thus avoided a dislocation. That poor shoulder had taken more abuse than was good for him, and he probably needed surgery quite desperately, but he would never take it. Besides, he was a jockey… he couldn’t be a jockey without some horrible injury plaguing him all his life… as if the improperly healed and thus constantly braced wrist wasn’t enough, or all those places and screws in his leg, or the multiple concussions, or the broken ribs or punctured lung… he was a walking disaster… a doctor’s worst nightmare.

He was in the middle of working King, and all was going relatively well. The ¾ blind stallion had taken such huge strides since Anthony first came across him. He was completely blind in one eye, and probably at least half blind in the other, but watching him run you’d never know it. He trusted Anthony so much you would never guess there was anything wrong with him. He was just approaching the gate at a full gallop when he happened to glance over at the very pregnant Alex standing there watching as always, just to see her bent in pain. Without even thinking, he pulled back hastily on the reins, and King, having such a connection with Anthony caught the panic in his rider and responded instantly, digging all four hooves into the ground and going from a full gallop to a sliding stop in a split second as he slammed on the breaks. Before the horse had even stopped though, Anthony was on the ground and over to Alex’s side.

Something was wrong… as little as he knew about this sort of thing, he knew something was wrong, and when he saw the blood… there was no doubt in his mind that she needed a doctor ASAP. Of course, being the horseman that he was, there was the lingering thought of the racehorse on the track, but nearly all his attention was on his wife. He was panicking internally, and that was translating into not being able to think clearly at all. Luckily Alex, being the rock that she was, managed to keep a clearer head than him and somehow or another got him thinking clearly enough to help her back to the barn into the truck and to the hospital. Though Anthony didn’t realize it, the ever faithful thoroughbred followed closely behind them, worried by his two humans’ panic. He always seemed to know when things weren’t right, especially with Alex and Anthony. When the two of them got into the truck and drove away, they left him standing in the parking lot of the stable watching the hastily disappearing vehicle with that “concerned horse” look written all over his face.

Upon arriving at the ER, the doctors hastily took the bleeding Alex from Anthony, and left him standing there in the hospital waiting room, horrified at the concept of what might be happening behind those swinging doors. It took all of what little nerve and will power he had left to keep himself from keeping his gaze fixated on her blood on his shirt. For the first time in a long time, the one guy who could always find something positive in every situation could only think the worst. That was his wife they had taken… that was his baby’s life that now seemed to be in limbo… where was the positive side to this?

He sank down into one of the waiting room chairs, head in hands. The ticking of the clock felt like a horrible droning bell announcing the impending doom of his wife and child as time seemed to drag on in a never ending vortex of horror. This was a nightmare… the worst kind… the sort that came true… when your perfect world came crashing down. He was going to have the perfect family… the American dream… and now he wasn’t so sure he was going to have anything at the end of the day. His reality had suddenly become a living hell, and it would take a miracle to reverse the hands of fate.

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[Alex Lovasz]

There are key times in a girl’s life that are of utter importance. Such as her first trip to Disneyland, her 16th birthday, her 18th birthday, her 21st birthday, her first boyfriend, her first anniversary, the day she gets purposed to, her wedding day, and the day she gives birth to her first child. For every girl their wedding is basically the happily ever after to their own fairytale. Every girl dreams of prince charming coming to their rescue to save them from the darkness that’s bringing them down. To run in and slay the dragon whisking her off her feet and onto his faithful steed. From Cinderella to Princess Fiona on Shrek… they all have their own little versions… but every version ends the same. The Princess and her prince Charming getting into a carriage and…Living Happily Ever After. Every girl of every age does it… no matter how much they deny it they all want the fairytale story to tell all their friends so they can giggle and say ooo and aww… All girls love sharing and comparing their stories of how they met the man of their dreams and how they wrote their names thousands of times with his last time. Every woman in the entire world loves to think they’re living in some fairytale land where there is a man to save them in.

All except Alex Chasse. She didn’t waste any time dreaming about the perfect man that was out there just waiting to sweep her off her feet. No, she was perfectly capable of taking care of herself and that’s what she had planned on doing. There was only one time she thought about how her wedding would be and that was only for her best friend’s sake. Other than that one time she had never thought about her life being a fairytale at all. And that one time hardly qualified as thinking of her life as a fairytale. She had only described what her perfect dream wedding would be… she never even considered what the guy at the end of the aisle would look or act like. There were too many other things in life to focus on, she thought. You could waste your whole life dreaming about something that was non existent…or you could toss out the idea that there was a perfect guy in the world and live your life achieving all that you want all on your own.

After living with her dad and brothers, Alex was convinced that chivalry was dead. In her world you either fended for yourself or you got left in everyone’s dust. Her dad being a former marine was very strict and….emotionless to say the least. He had a zero tolerance rule for whining and crying…and complaining… or rather anything that wasn’t considered obedience. He was tough… but if he wasn’t Alex wouldn’t be the woman she is today, and that’s Young and very successful. Though, she hates her dad…she did thank him for one thing… and that was for making her as strong as she was now. Had it not been for him she wouldn’t have been so independent, smart, and successful. By 18 she was working on her own business and moved out of her parents’ house. By 19 she had Loco and was working on her own racing career. Never in a million years would her family or friends…or herself for that matter, have imagined her married and starting her own family. But Alex liked to do everything her own… way and I guess you could say she usually did it faster than everyone else.

Fast-forward a couple years and she was married and about to have her first child. The woman who didn’t believe in fairytales, happily ever afters, and prince charmings had met her very own prince charming. It was as if the world was set on proving her wrong…. And showing her that there was a perfect man out there…Literally. Anthony Lovasz was literally the perfect man. If you met him you would be convinced that there was absolutely nothing faulty with him. Even so, when Alex met him she would have never been able to predict the fact that she would be saying “I love you too” just a few short hours later. He may have been the perfect man but she was far from the perfect woman. They may have rushed into things… but it wasn’t foolishly. They truly did love each other, I suppose you could say it was love at first sight, well…almost anyways.

At the time she didn’t see anything wrong with how fast they had moved forward… but now looking back she realized they did move extremely fast… but she never regretted it. Being with Anthony was the smartest choice she had ever made, if not the only smart decision. Alex and Anthony were probably the perfect couple. They never fought… usually because Alex was always right…. And Anthony knew it, but for the most part…nothing ever went wrong for them. Sure they had their ups and downs but it usually had nothing to do with their relationship so much as what surrounded it. Such as their friends, but even with all the drama and chaos…at the end of the day they were still in love…if not more than the day before. She wouldn’t trade having Anthony’s love for anything in the entire universe. That was true blue love ladies and gentleman.

Now here she was married to Anthony and pregnant with his son, not to mention the happiest woman in the world…or at least in her opinion. Being as this is her first pregnancy…she basically had no idea what she was doing. Well of course there was her general instinct but let’s face it…even if the doctor ordered her to strict bed rest, that wasn’t going to stop her from working. Other than Anthony and now this little boy… Work was Alex’s live and without it she had no idea what to do with herself. She would surely go insane if she didn’t work…which is precisely why, in her ninth month of pregnancy, she was at the race track watching Anthony exercise ride the horse, like they did every day. Other than the crazy cravings she was pretty much normal. She didn’t suffer from major morning sickness… it was a little bad in the beginning but now it had gone. Nor did she have wacky mood swings. In fact… other than the large belly…you probably wouldn’t be able to tell that she was pregnant. Anthony definitely could tell… poor guy she did feel guilty about the late night/early morning ventures to the market. She just couldn’t help it…

Though this was her first pregnancy… it wouldn’t be her first time raising a baby. That was an entirely different story though… But being the mom to Tyler’s baby girl was very different from actually having your own child and raising it. Because at the end of the day little baby Ale didn’t have her genes… and would always be Tyler’s little girl… not hers. It was a hard concept for the rest of the world to understand. But for Alex…it was easy. Of course taking care of a baby and being pregnant at the same time was far from easy, but Alex was known for doing the impossible. Nine months pregnant, mom figure, wife, company manager/owner, and horse trainer/owner/rider were just a few of the things that fell into her job description. Sure she never got more than an hour or 2 of sleep but she never complained. She liked being busy… and feeling needed.

Today started off like any other day… waking up after what seemed like just moments after falling asleep, getting dressed taking the baby to the sitters house… This in most cases was Cheyenne or someone who was now used to being woken up at oh dark thirty in the morning. From there it was to the barn to…well now that she was pregnant…just watch Anthony do all the workouts. She hated putting Loco on a nine month leave, though technically she did ride him a few months into the pregnancy before being scolded by Anthony and the rest of the world for putting herself and the baby in danger… so now Loco spent his days out in pasture… unless Andrew, Anthony’s brother, came to work with him, which he did often. Then of course there was the new foal, Ozzy, But Ozzy wasn’t a danger to mankind so Anthony could work with him… on the days that Doubt and King didn’t nearly kill him. Anyways, back to the point, Her job now was to keep records of all their track workouts make sure their on the right feed all that technical paperwork stuff that she was good at and Anthony hated.

Just another busy day for Alex… they had made it through Doubts workout with little difficulty. She did have to admit he was getting better… and he wasn’t nearly as ill tempered as Loco so he had that going for him. It was just getting to the point now that she didn’t have memory flashes of the first day she met Anthony when doubt threw him. Anthony couldn’t afford any major injuries, especially to his shoulder, and Alex knew it. She disliked hospitals almost to the extent of hatred that Anthony had for them. First she almost lost him in one… then she lost her best friend. Of course she handled her hatred a lot better than Anthony it rarely ever showed… course hatred was an emotional response and other than her 3 C’s of life she hardly ever showed a drastic emotion… Well unless it was the given happiness… What girl wasn’t extremely happy to so her man when he came walking in the door? Even that excitement was rare but she always greeted him with a smile… even when things were sour. That’s just how she was and Anthony knew that’s how she was but usually he was pretty good at getting her to open up and talk to him instead of working herself to death.

So now you probably have a general idea of how life is for them. Hectic…yet perfect. They’re lives would no doubt be turned into a variation fairytale one day. King was next…. Though the big horse was nearly completely blind he was the best horse they had so far and he was the closest to being ready to race. Anthony had definitely worked a miracle on that horse… and now here they were flying gracefully around the track. To any outsider it would be impossible to tell he was blind from there. Alex was pretty pleased that the morning workouts were going so smoothly nothing had gone wrong and it was wounding down to an end… and though she had spent most of the morning leaning against the rail just watching she continually found herself winded… with a strange tingling feeling from her waist down. But Alex being Alex didn’t complain or even mention the weird sensation.

The rhythmic sound of hooves hitting the ground at a rapid pace was like classical music to Alex’s ears. Her eyes drifted closed as she soaked in the sounds and smells of the familiar place. Very familiar actually considering she was there nearly every day all day. The day was warm with a refreshing cool breeze perfect track conditions it wasn’t too muddy or soft nor was it to hard… it was just perfect. Though he was occasionally quite a distance away she could still here King’s heavy breathing along with his hooves hitting the ground. It was all so familiar and soothing and peaceful…all but the cooling sensation she was starting to get down the inside of her leg. Her eyes flickered open in curiosity along with the slight tilt of her head. But the look of innocent confusion was quickly replaced with a cringe on pain…followed shortly by her reeling over in pain.

By the time she opened her eyes Anthony was there already off King and right beside her. She forced her glimmer of panic and worry aside once she saw him breathing steadily and staying calm for his sake. Sticking to her 3 C’s of life she managed to get him calmed down and help him help her back down to the barn. Though in extreme pain she didn’t want him to see her panic… due to watching her brothers be born she knew this was far from normal and inside her mothering instinct was going insane with worry. The managed to get down to the barn but the pain was just increasing and staying calm was getting harder and harder. Despite all her efforts it was clear in her eyes that she was worried, panicked, and in a ton of pain. Now in the truck she had completely forgotten all about what they had been doing and all her focus was now on her baby and what the hell was wrong. Her grip in the door handle to the car, being as it was tight enough to crush glass, was enough to radiate the amount of excruciating pain that she was in. Though her breath was calm and her face was relaxed it was evident in her eyes that she was far from calm, cool, and collected.

Next thing she knew she was being rushed through hospital doors… away from Anthony. She hated the idea of him seeing her like this… worried and scared that is… but not having him with her scared her even more. They had made it through several hospital trips since the first one… but every time before they had been together. Together they were Anthony and Alex, the invincible flawless couple… Apart she was just Alex. With the amount of blood she had lost and the pain… and the panic… consciousness was slowly slipping away from her. Being the stubborn woman and fighter that she was she forced her eyes open and tried to focus on something making sure she wouldn’t pass out. She was trying to ask what was going on… but though she thought her mouth was moving and she thought she was hearing herself… her voice had seemed to escape her. It was frustrating being so worried and not being able to do a thing about the situation. But with all that going on… and her mind moving at about 1,000,000 miles per hour she didn’t notice them stick her with and anesthetic.

Doctors and nurses scrambling, shouting, blood, panic, “we’re losing them”, metal clanging against metal, rubber cloves, face masks, white walls, monitors beeping, “he’s going to make it”, crying, towels. Chaos completely surrounded the unconscious Alex Lovasz. The nurse came out to inform Anthony that “they believed they were going to lose the baby.” Then not but minutes later another nurse came out solemnly… “Mr. Lovasz…. You’re now a father of a gorgeous baby boy…. But… I’m afraid we’re going to have to ask you to leave and go to the nursery….We’re losing her… we’re doing everything we can but…” She stopped and just shook her head obviously expressing her sympathy. But how would her sympathy help him… or Alex. She stood and waited for the news to sink in… she wanted to offer her support but it was her job to escort him away from the ER and to the Nursery. She turned away to whisper something to the desk clerk afraid to look at him.

[Andrew Lovasz]

Grocery store, home, work, home, grocery store, home, school, home, work, grocery store, Home, work…or was it school. Now days it wasn’t a strange sight to see Andrew in the school parking lot at midnight or fast asleep at his desk during class… the poor guy tended to get his schedule all mixed up… mostly due to the lack of sleep and the constant running around. These were the duties of a soon to be dad though… well just a few really. He basically kicked out any social life he once had as soon as he told that frightened girl that he wasn’t going to leave and that he would take care of her. Yes he was constantly tired and felt like death the majority of the time… but not once did he wish he would have left her, not once did he regret his decision to take care of her. Though, in his mind there was no choice. He may be a huge thingyy jackass who had a habit for getting around, but he did have a small piece of gentleman and chivalry… I mean him and Anthony were related weren’t they? And Anthony used to be Andrew’s Idol so it was only natural that he pick up a few things from him.

It was funny how an act that was supposed to symbolize love and be something totally magical and amazing could so easily destroy someone’s life. Andrew didn’t believe that his life was destroyed… at first yeah but now it was just life. He accepted it… and he loved Sydney and that simple fact right there made waking up every morning that much easier. Unless of course she had vomit breath and that kind of tainted it a little bit. But at the end of the day coming home to her just seemed to make it all seem worthwhile. Sure most of the time he acted like a zombie and it mortified all of his friends enough to always make sure they were having safe sex…. Never in a million years would he have predicted that he would be the one to slip up… he was always so careful…. Not that he exactly called it an accident… because well it was sort of accidently on purpose. I mean lets face it there is really only one way to have a baby and he didn’t exactly avoid it… that part was entirely on purpose… the pregnant and baby part was the accident part.

One pregnant lady was enough to make every man on earth go insane… But two? Only the Perfect man and his brother could handle that… and even they were just skimming by. Living under the same roof, Andrew and Anthony saw each other just about as much as they had after Anthony left. Anthony was always at the barn and Andrew was always…. Somewhere. Now that they both had pregnant women in their life though they found themselves running into each other more and more… Especially around 1 in the morning. The first time it happened Andrew was about ¾ asleep… basically completely incoherent, sent on a mission to bring back ranch flavored Pringles… he had stopped asking about the cravings after about 10 times. He opened their bedroom door and headed down the stairs and toward the front door just to run right into Anthony. Of course it didn’t occur to him till the next morning when he thought it had been a dream… that is until he saw the can of Pringles. But neither him nor Anthony ever mentioned it. In fact… they may see a lot more of each other but nothing was ever said. Usually Andrew was to out of it to say anything and the next morning Anthony was always long gone before Andrew woke up.

One of Andrew’s many jobs was taming Alex’s insane horse Loco… well named if you asked me. With Alex unable to ride due to the fact that she was about to pop there wasn’t much he could do with him. Sure he rode him and walked him around the stables desensitizing him to the company of other human beings… other than Himself and Alex. He had just arrived at the barn after checking on Sydney for the… oh he lost count. He was sitting in the front seat of the truck dazing out the window when he saw… what he thought was King. He blinked a few times, then shook his head and looked back, then rubbed his eyes slightly. Surely his eyes were playing tricks on him and he was just imagining the giant blind thoroughbred standing in the middle of the stable yard. He sat there for a few moments before slowly opening his door and stepping toward his hallucination. As he stepped closer he could here King snort and swish his tail against his flanks, but he still wasn’t completely convinced. When King’s big head lifted from the grass and turned toward him, he put his hands on the horse’s nose grabbing the bridle. “Hey big guy…. What are you doing out here”

Now convinced he wasn’t dreaming he glanced around the yard to find exactly what he had expected… no one. Andrew is a smart guy, sure he was extremely exhausted and out of it, but even so it didn’t take him but a few seconds to figure out what had happened. So he lead the big horse into the barn untacked him and put him back into his stall before getting back into his truck and heading for the hospital. He picked up his cell phone in order to call Sydney but decided against it thinking that it would be better to wait and see what was going on rather than worry an easily stressed out hormonal woman. Straight to the hospital he went… and being the guy that he was he was keeping his calm. Even though he seemed to hate Anthony and was still mad at him for what he did… he really did care about his Brother. And Alex had been the biggest help in his dilemma so yeah he was worried… Sure she could have just gone into labor… but he knew Alex pretty well and he didn’t figure if she went into labor that she would just leave King… she would have had Anthony put him away first. So that meant that something had to have gone wrong…

After what seemed like an eternity search the hospital for where Alex Lovasz was checked in…. or Anthony Lovasz he finally got told where to go which of course was the complete opposite side of the hospital from where he was at. He was really starting to believe in Karma now. Completely out of breath from running through the entire hospital he finally made it to the area where Alex was admitted. Slowing down and glancing around he started to catch his breath and spotted Anthony. But only stepped up to him just in time to hear the nurse ask him to leave. He stopped in shock but shook his head trying to collect himself… he needed to help his brother. Despite everything they had been through they were still family and even though Andrew was known for being a jackass he wasn’t heartless and he cared about his brother and his family. Pulling himself together he stepped over to Anthony and put his hand on his shoulder… not sure what to say considering he’s a guy and comforting words weren’t exactly his forte.

For once in his life Andrew had to take on the role of being Anthony and be positive, supportive, and caring. For the most part Andrew acted like he didn’t care about anything or one. When in reality he had a very compassionate heart. Sure he could come off like a jerk but he had a rough past and the last thing he wanted was to be known as a woos. But if anything becoming a father had changed him into something he never thought he could be. Something he never wanted to be. But now he was starting to realize it wasn’t so bad. “She’ll be okay Anthony” the words escaped his lips softly but confidently. He knew if anyone would overcome something bad it was Alex. She was the bravest woman he had ever met. And he honestly believed that everything was going to be okay. Partially because Alex was strong… and Partially because something like this…couldn’t and shouldn’t happen to someone like Anthony… if there was such thing as Karma, Anthony would be one with a lot of good Karma… and something this bad wouldn’t happen to him. He was too good of a guy to get punished so harshly.

[Anthony Lovasz]

Calm, reserved, the voice of reason, level headed, positive, encouraging, always knowing the right thing to say or do... that was how everyone saw Anthony. Yes, he had his moment... and yes, that is in singular form. The only time anyone had ever seen Anthony any less than completely level headed was when Alex left after Alessandra's death... and even then, it wasn't like he was completely thrown off, he was just following the example of everyone around him by burying himself in his work... and his work just so happened to be riding a mostly insane thoroughbred race horse around the track with the extremely high risk of getting himself injured or killed in the process of doing so. Yes, it was true, at that point Doubt had been still rather violent on the track and honestly dangerous... but Anthony didn't care. It took extreme concentrated power of will to keep his mind off Alex, and it took extreme concentrated power of will to control Doubt, so really, it was the perfect thing to keep him sane while she was gone.

So much had happened to them in the past two years. Anyone who knew Anthony could attest that he normally did things fast. He grew up fast, he became a jockey fast, he made decisions fast, he rode horses fast... he certainly never wasted time... but no one would have guessed that he was the sort of guy to fall in love and get married as quickly as he did. but Anthony knew Alex was the one he wanted to spend his life with. Don't ask how he knew, because he didn't really know... all he knew was that he loved her, and that was more than enough reason for him. Every moment he spent with her he fell more in love with her. Even after they were married. She had him wrapped around he finger from the moment he first met her... even when her insane horse tried to kill him.

The day of their wedding was one of the happiest of his life. That happiness kept his nerves level and calm all day up until the point that he was standing at the front of the crowd anxiously awaiting the arrival of his bride It seemed like an eternity passed by, and with every second, his calm and collected cool seemed to fade. He wasn't sure why he was nervous... he knew this was what he wanted, and he knew this was what Alex wanted, so why he was nervous was a mystery to him. Maybe it was because the end of his life as he knew it was coming to an end, and a whole new thing was starting... something better... something far more glorious than he ever could have imagined. Alex was that one girl he had been looking for all his life. Sure, it never seemed to anyone else that he was looking or even interested in a relationship... but like every guy, it was there, and he was looking for someone to spend the rest of his life with. That someone was Alex.

Now here they were, nearly to their one year anniversary and Alex and their baby could be lying there dying and there was nothing he could do about it. His heart was pounding in his chest and he was sure all of Pinewood could hear it. This wasn't supposed to happen... he wasn't supposed to have her for only a year just to lose her... they weren't supposed to get through nine months of her pregnancy just to lose their baby... this wasn't the way it was supposed to go. They were supposed to have their happily ever after, they were supposed to grow old together, she was supposed to force him to finally retire before he killed himself on the track, they were supposed to watch their kids graduate and get married... it wasn't supposed to end so soon and without any sort of warning.

He didn't know how long he had been there... for all he knew it could have been hours, but the stress and the worry combined with his involuntary intolerance of hospital sterilization was all building up and had started the slightest shaking in his hands. Without Alex this life wouldn't be worth it... and he couldn't think of anything but what would happen if she didn't make it through this. He hardly heard the first nurse that came out and told him they thought they were going to lose the baby. As horrible as it sounds, that actually gave him a little hope. Yes, he would be devastated if their son died, but she said nothing of Alex, that had to be a good sign for Alex... that had to mean she was alright. He could get through anything so long as she was with him, and even if the baby was lost, at least he would still have... We're losing her...

His thoughts were jerked sharply away from that little glimmer of hope that had managed to cut through the ever growing feeling of despair. Those words echoed in his mind over and over again. His wife was dying and there was nothing he could do about it. Anthony just stood there for what seemed like ages, too shocked to respond, too terrified to move, too horrified at the concept of living without Alex to do anything. He barely felt the hand on his shoulder, and it didn't even register in his mind that it was his younger, yet much taller brother standing beside him breathlessly. His assurance that she would be alright fell on seemingly deaf ears. The concept of life without Alex had never even occurred to him before now, and all of a sudden his whole world was shattering into a million tiny shards that could never be put together again.

All he could hear and all he could think about was that Alex was dying... and that he couldn't possibly be a dad without her. Yes, he knew how to take care of a child, he'd been helping her with Ale for about a year now... but taking care of a child and being a parent were two entirely different things, and Anthony was in no way cut out to be a single dad. He wasn't like Charlie... he couldn't balance his work and his child, he couldn't multi-task, he could hardly take care of himself well enough to get by, how was he supposed to take care of a baby without his wife around? Everything he knew was turning upside down and he couldn't do anything to fix it... and Anthony was the kind of guy who needed to fix things. From the horses he rode to the friends he had... there was always the need to fix things, and that was what attracted him to those things... but now here he was, completely helpless to do anything... and his world was slipping out of his fingers like sand in the tide.

He wasn't quite sure how he got there, but when the world suddenly resumed it's hectic and unforgiving pace, he was standing outside the nursery window, and just on the other side of the glass was a tiny baby boy with "Lovasz" written on his wrist band, and standing there beside him was Andrew. He didn't know how long his brother had been there, and if he had said anything in the past... however long it had been since the nurse had said they were losing her... he sure hadn't heard it. It was fairly clear by the look on his face that he was just completely lost and had no idea what to do. Alex was his world, and he needed her to survive. He wanted nothing more than for her to be alright... to wake up and find out this was all just a horrible horrible nightmare.

The baby was just a little hope to him... at least he wasn't losing everything. He didn't have a clue how he would get by without Alex, but at least he hadn't lost both of them. He knew all too well that today was supposed to be the happiest day of his life... but how could he possibly be happy when they just told him his wife was dying. This baby needed his mom. He was beginning to realize how Tyler felt when Alessandra died when their baby was born. It was a horrible sinking feeling... he knew he should be happy that their child was alive, but he just couldn't seem to get his mind off losing his wife, and it was killing him. Their son needed both of his parents, and if Alex didn't survive... well, he might not get either of his parents. Anthony relied on Alex completely... as pathetic as it sounded... when he gave her that ring, when he said I do... he gave her his heart, and promised her forever. He simply couldn't comprehend forever ending so soon.

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[Andrew Lovasz]

If there was anyone in the whole entire world that you could count on being a stable couple it was Alex and Anthony. They had a solid foundation and nothing ever seemed to rock them even the slightest little bit. Andrew was positive there was nothing that could ruin their relationship or cause them to stumble. They were perfect… it was almost sickening the way they were so indestructible… But after finding out Sydney was pregnant and deciding they were going to make it work… he slowly started to realize how they made it work. It was easy to work things out when you wanted to, and it was easy to want to make things work out when you were in love. Yes that’s right I said love. Andrew Lovasz was admittedly completely unconditionally and irrevocably head over heels in love with Sydney Montgomery. And there wasn’t a thing in the entire universe that was ever going to change his mind. But he knew, despite his actions, that if it weren’t for Alex and Anthony he and Sydney would never be where they were today. Heck who knew if Andrew would even still be around.

Alex wasn’t a force to be reckoned with, and just the thought of her not making it was enough to render anyone unconscious just from shock. She was always so strong and stable nothing seemed to surprise her or shake her. When she heard about Andrew and Sydney she didn’t kick him out or scold him in disappointment. She brought them in and was helping them get on their feet. She gave Andrew a job doing what he loved and paid him well. Alex was like everyone’s guardian angel, she looked after Alessandra, baby Ale, Anthony, Tyler, Andrew, Sydney, and basically everyone who got themselves into a tight spot. She was like the secret back door away from those places… It was nearly impossible to imagine life without her. Sure he might be being selfish but he knew way too many people needed her, for her to just leave like this… it was too quick, too sudden; there was no warning at all.

Then there was Anthony. Andrew watched his brother sink into the darkest state he had ever seen him in. And given that Andrew had missed a chunk of Anthony’s life he had still seen him at his worst…. But this was way worse than anything Andrew had ever seen Anthony go through. Andrew and Sydney’s relationship was nothing in comparison to Anthony and Alex’s but if that was Sydney in there and the doctors were saying she wasn’t going to make it… Andrew was sure he would look just like Anthony. He watched him move numbly down the halls as the nurse guided the both of them to the nursery area wishing that there was something he could do. Expressing his feelings even just slightly was extremely difficult for Andrew. But if there was even the tiniest inch of a chance that expressing his emotions would make Anthony feel better he wouldn’t hesitate to do so. He may not have shown it very well but he cared very much for his older brother and he didn’t like seeing him like this… there was a lot of nursing staff that had gotten glares from him in the short walk to the nursery… Anyone who had given Anthony a sympathetic look got the protective glare. Usually it was the older brother that was protective… but Anthony wasn’t really like that and Andrew didn’t expect anything of the sort from him. It was always Andrew against the world… So he didn’t make it a habit of depending on anyone…course now he had Sydney and their baby depending on him for anything… But that was all beside the point.

Anyone who passed him a sympathetic look got a look of death… like they had any idea what was going on… Like any of them knew what was going. Like they could relate…. They had no idea… it was really starting to piss him off none of them had any idea what Anthony was going through. He wanted to hit someone… yeah… that’s how it worked for Andrew… he felt bad for his brother… and not knowing how to channel that emotional combustion it just translated into one really ticked off Andrew with a very short fuse. He was like a time bomb ready to explode on anyone who even dared come up to them. Not only was he protective over Anthony he was also protective over Alex… she was his sister-in-law and that meant something to him… maybe it was just the “family” aspect that every Hispanic person had… but Alex was family now and if anyone dared mess with her you bet he would be right behind Anthony in throwing the first punch… or I guess the second one in his case. Like they really knew how great she was… Anthony did… but these people didn’t have a clue.

After his initial words he stayed quiet partially because he had no idea what to say. What could he say to a man who was just informed that his wife was dying… Other than having no idea what to say he was pretty sure it wouldn’t register anyways. Anthony had one of these looks… it was a look he got when he wasn’t listening to anything and just totally zoned out his eyes got all glazed over and everything. The look he had now was sort of a version of that look… but much much more depressing. He looked so solemn and…just gone… like he wasn’t there… his body was but his mind was gone. Andrew just walked with him down the halls protecting him from the sympathy vultures that surrounded them. It wasn’t long after they got to the nursery that Anthony finally snapped out of it, unlike the other times when he came out of his Anthony look he didn’t smile… the light didn’t return to his face the color didn’t come back. He was still pale and sick looking, but Andrew didn’t blame him at all.

The look of life barely returned to Anthony as he came too and peered into the glass window into the nursery. There in the window was a little baby boy in the bed that read “Lovasz.” Truthfully this whole thing terrified Andrew. If this could happen to the people he saw as invincible if Alex could be back there hanging by a string… what would happen to Sydney. It took everything he had in him to push those thoughts out of his head… but he couldn’t help it…it sat there in the back of his mind haunting him. His whole body trembled slightly before he got control of himself and focused on the little bundle inside the window. He silently prayed for his brother… typically Andrew wasn’t religious at all. Sure he was raised catholic just like Anthony but unlike Anthony absolutely nothing stuck. As soon as he was out he was gone leaving just a trail of dust behind him...living life by his own rules and no one else’s. But at a time like this… he was pretty sure it was needed, and he knew there wasn’t anything else he could do. He absolutely hated the feeling of being helpless… there was nothing he could do… so he figured it couldn’t hurt to pray.

The probably looked liked a couple of grim reapers standing there dazing into the nursery pale faced and eyes drawn back. What do you do when your wife is slipping away from you, when your reason for living is slipping away, when it’s starting to look like the only thing you’re going to have left of her is your new born, and what do you do…when the guy who’s going through all that is your brother? Not being much of a man for words he turned to Anthony placing his hand on his shoulder basically expressing everything a normal person would say in just one look. They may have their differences but they were family and that was that. He was going to be there for Anthony no matter what… Brotherly love an odd but good bond… Which in any normal family would include random wrestling matches and a lot of laughter… but for Anthony and Andrew it involved basically no contact… but when it came right down to it they would look out for each other. Anthony welcomed him in when he had nowhere else to go, and Andrew was going to help him get through this… no matter what he had to do he would take care of his brother… doing anything he could. He took a deep breath setting aside all his issues and things he had been dealing with… none of it was as important as being there for his brother right now.