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Post by Charlie Parker on Feb 21, 2009 20:09:59 GMT -5
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Post by torres on Mar 1, 2009 17:07:26 GMT -5
This also happens... Jess looks around and sees that apparently some people haven't got a clue what they're doing when they do apps and decides to make a lovely exposition on what is supposed to be entered in each section of the application... to par, in order to get accepted. LLAMA LLAMA DUCK! STOLE YOUR HEART; They call me JESS and I've shot for the moon 19 times.
You know you all love me and you can contact me via The pony express.
Ktxbi.
» There Goes my Hero;
The birth certificate reads Dolly Freaking Llama
But Everyone Calls Me Llama
Ive Been Breaking Hearts for 45 years
The say I Am ...a priest...
Ive Been Told I Look Like llama...
» Rock and Roll, Baby.;
I am so tall 4'6" at the shoulder... about 6'8" at the head
And I Weigh About 700 lbs
Ive Bee Ninked And Pierced nada
They always say I look like Llama is a really funny looking chick in all honesty. She has a rather long neck... scratch that, a really long neck, and lots and lots and lots of fluffy white hair. It gives her a rather...well, different look that's for sure. But hey, with hair like that you don't have to worry about freezing to death in the winter right? Besides, it's the new style really, I mean, everybody is wearing fur these days... she's the only lucky one who doesn't have to go out and spend hundreds of dollars on it.
She has a rather long nose... it sort of protrudes out of her face in an almost dog like fashion which gives her a rather human look... imagine that. Her eyes are quite large and very black, sort of dull and lazy looking most of the time, though on occasion when the wild dogs break into the sheep pens she gets all psycho and kicks their ass with this wild look in her eye. Her ears are sort of almost... elfish, only they sit more towards the top of her head and are kind of shaped like a mule's ears, but hey, she's unique, don't judge.
She practically idolizes Chuck Bass, and so has taken to wearing scarves on a regular basis. When she walks, people stop and stare because well... you ever seen a llama walk? Yes, it looks just exactly like that for some reason or another. She has a quite fitting last name really, but now I'm side tracking on a random rabbit trail and should get back to what I was talking about. Aside from the scarf, she really doesn't wear anything. She's got enough hair to cover it all, so there's really no point in buying clothes. Her feet are quite small, though she never wears shoes either due to her feet having hardened enough to walk on without pain.
This Is What Makes Me Stand Out the entirety of her existence.
» Chances Taken, Hope Embraced;
I Adore
carrots
grass
hay
sunshine
doing nothing all day
I Abhor
meat
mud
rain
having to work
I Rock
her aim in spitting is pro, good luck beating her.
climbing mountains
kicking wolf ass
I Suck
She's a horrible communicator
I Do
She spits on people she doesn't like
I Want
To climb mount Everest
I Fear
being made into a throw rug
I Shut up
She's actually a llama
I am Llama is her own person, and no one will ever be able to change that. With her unique sense of style and charming disposition to go along with it, it's nearly impossible to not fall in love with her. Of course, the spitting is a bit of a turn off, but other than that she is a total sweet heart. Once you get to know her, she'll be your best friend ever. She's as loyal as a faithful dog, and you can bet she'll have your back.
Her favorite past time is protecting sheep, and when she grows up (if she ever does) she wants to become a shepherd. There's nothing she delights in more than the satisfying feeling of knowing that all those little ovines can eat their grass in peace and not worry about being eaten them selves. That's part of her over all charm, she's always looking out for the little guy, especially the babies. She absolutely loves babies. If she were given the chance she would spend her whole life running around with the cute little fluffy babies.
If there is one thing she hates, it's people who aren't willing to expand their horizons. There's a whole world out there, and there is always something waiting over the horizon for you to discover. Curiosity may have killed the cat, but exploration destroyed the belief that the world is flat and created endless opportunities. Discovering new things is a hobby of hers, and she wishes that everyone else would follow in her foot steps and break out of the norm. Who knows, maybe you're the one who is going to create the cure for cancer.
» I Know I Won't Be Home At All;
I Came From
Bob llama- appaloosa-60-packer.
Sandy llama- albino-54-packer
I Share My Dna With none
I Come From Llama land
But I Live Here Now Pinewood West Virginia
This Is Who I was Llama was born on a very small llama farm about 45 years ago to Bob and Sandy Llama. Everyone in llama land was extremely excited for the birth of the little llama, but little did they know, there were soon to be profoundly disappointed. Dolly Freaking Llama wasn't anything like the other llamas. She wanted to go places, do things, become something great, go down in history. She wasn't happy with living a drab life like all the other llamas.
Now, Bob and Sandy were both well renowned packers, and they expected that Dolly would follow in their footsteps and take up the family business. They were so determined, in fact, that they practically told her that she could never do anything else, and that it was her destiny to be a packer. Well, Dolly had other things on her mind, and one night while all the llamas slept, she snuck out of the house and ran away. She wasn't going to be just another pack llama, she was going to open the eyes of the whole llama world to the amazing possibilities out there. She was going to be an inspiration.
Well... once she got out into the real world, she realized it was going to be a lot harder than she thought. Everything was so different here than it was in llama land. She quickly discovered that she really didn't fit in, but she wasn't about to let that get her down. No, she was going to find her calling in this world if it killed her. She wasn't going to go crawling back to llama land when things got hard. She wasn't just going to give up. So she kept searching and searching and searching. Then one day, it hit her right between the eyes. No... not literally.
As she was walking past a TV store one day she saw a man by the name of Chuck Bass on TV and instantly fell in love with him. She longed to be with him, and even to be like him. So she started a scarf industry using llama wool to make all the scarves. Chuck Bass always wore scarves, maybe she would make him fall in love with her by making the scarves he wore some day. When she heard that he had moved to Pinewood, she had to follow him there. So now here she is in Pinewood West Virginia, searching for the love of her life.
This Is Who I am When push comes to shove, the llama always wins.
» This Heart It Beats;
I Lust men (straight)
I Love men who look like Chuck Bass
I Loathe men who don't look like Chuck Bass
Maybe I loved None
Maybe I Didnt N/A
» This Is How We'll Dance;
I Bow Down rulephrase
I Am Awesome RPGSAMPLE -- NOQUOTES
Thanks Isa for helping =]
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Post by Tyler Haze on Mar 4, 2009 2:27:11 GMT -5
And another one... People have been known to fear most that man which is angry with someone, but in all honesty, those men which should be feared most as those who have lost everything, those who have fallen down into hell past the point of no return, those who have nothing more to live for, whose entire world has fallen apart around them. Those men which should be feared most are those who, through more than just a series of unfortunate events have fallen into depression beyond what anyone else have experienced and can find no way back to what they once were and so resort to violence not because of anger, but as a way to show the whole world that they have nothing left. Those men who become more and more reckless with every passing moment while secretly hoping that it will kill them. Those men...the ones whose grief has molded into a desire for blood which stands on the border of insanity.
Tyler was one of these men. I will not reiterate to you once again as I have done so many times before what all has happened to him across time. What needs retelling at this point is the most recent event which has since shoved Tyler off the edge of the cliff that is his sanity which up until this point he has stood so perilously balanced on that even the slightest breeze would send him plummeting to his death. He had fallen and fallen hard. Every last piece of him had shattered into tiny shards that could hardly be seen, but somehow, he had managed to gather up most of them... but something wasn't put back together just the same as it had been before. Something was very different, and very wrong. When he stood back up again as he had so many times before, he wasn't Tyler Haze anymore. In the fall, Inmate 1326 had been released from where he had been bound for so long within Tyler, and no traces of Tyler could now be seen.
After Tyler and Vivian's breakup, which I'm sure you have all heard about, well, our good friend Ben Dawes thought that perhaps he could win Vivian back since Tyler no longer posed as a threat to anyone involving Vivian. Vivian shut him down though, and as we all know, when Vivian shuts someone down, she shuts them down hard. Well, Ben being the clever little devil that he is, decided that perhaps a game of kidnap might be appropriate. The game though, quickly turned serious. Things headed south, and after Vivian had been missing for quite some time, Tyler happened upon her bruised, drugged, bleeding, and unconscious in an alleyway. But there was one problem. Tyler was drunk... had been since they broke up with perhaps ten minutes of being sober every day. It was a miracle he hadn't overdosed on the stuff yet.
Anyway, in his drunk state of mind, he instantly jumped to the conclusion that she was dead, and as soon as that hit, something changed in him for the worst. All sadness vanished from his cold gray eyes, they became hard and full of hatred. He carried Vivian's limp, and what he thought was dead, body back to Sebastian's house. No one was home, and he knew it. He made quick work of the lock on the door, carried her in, and placed her carefully on the couch. Even with the alcohol clouding his reason he was swept back in time to another time when he had done this self same thing, only in a very different manner.
Vivian had disappeared for a few days without word to anyone on where she had gone, and Sebastian, of course, had been a complete wreck worrying about her. Tyler had been staying away from her as best he could lately, wanting to respect Sebastian. That was what set Tyler apart from most "street trash" criminals. he respected people that had authority. No one really had authority over him, but Sebastian was Vivian's guardian and what he said regarding her, in Tyler's mind was law. He had told Tyler to stay away, and for the most part he did. Tonight though, he happened to come across her passed out in an alley completely wasted.
With strong yet gently hands, he lifted her up and carried her carefully back home, almost cradling her in his powerful arms. He knocked on the door, Sebastian answered, and directed him to put Vivian on the couch. He did so carefully, pausing a moment to get one last look at her beautiful face. He was about to turn to leave when her eyes fluttered open and she smiled up at him. She asked him to stay, but with Sebastian looking over his shoulder like a vulture just waiting to swoop in and devour him, he couldn't bring himself to. He walked out quickly, almost fearing the holes Sebastian was burning in his back. He was about to leave when Sebastian's voice stopped him. The question took Tyler completely off guard. What's wrong with you? [/s] Tyler didn't have an answer... at least not one that he was willing to admit to. In all honesty, he was hurting... and he was afraid to fall in love again. But he couldn't tell Sebastian that... he couldn't even tell Vivian that. It brought back to many painful memories that he was trying to bury. So he went with the answer that had never failed him. I don't know. Sebastian's response shocked him though... he told him to go inside and talk to her, to tell her that he loved her, then went inside without another word. After a few moments Tyler took said advice, and walked back in and kissed her, whispering softly in her ear that he loved her, then he vanished back out in the darkness that was the night.[/i] That was what happened here... only there was no whispering of "I love you" in her ear, there was no confrontation man to man. After placing her gently there, he rose back up to his feet and was gone. This wasn't the good kind of gone though... this was the beginning of a manhunt. He was going to find whoever killed her if it killed him, and he was going to make them pay... so help him God, he was going to make them pay it 100 times over. He was sending them straight to hell, and if he had to go with them, then he would go readily. Tyler Haze was gone completely and a stronger renewed Inmate 1326 had risen from the dead. Come what may, he was going to kill. It took some time, but Tyler found that it had been Ben Dawes who had kidnapped her, and lord help the kid. Tyler's wrath was now hell bent on destroying the very existence of Ben. It took a very short time after that for Tyler to track Ben down. He was, after all, the king of these streets, he could find anyone he wanted to. Anyway, he found Ben, and without a moment's hesitation unleashed his fury on him. Ben was a good fighter, and got in a few here and there, but honestly, there was very nearly not a soul out there who could take Inmate 1326. Tyler maybe, could be defeated in a fight in which he actually fought back... but Inmate 1326 was practically invincible, especially at this heightened level of anger. When all was said and done, Ben lay in a pool of his own blood, not dead, but well on his way, and Tyler walked away, leaving him for dead. Justice is often the cruelest injustice of all, and when Tyler was the bearer of it, there would be the devil to pay. His wrath could be compared to the racing fire of ten thousand burning hells, and that wrath had been driven out upon Ben. The lust for blood to avenge Vivian had intoxicated Tyler's mind driven him to and over the brink. There was nothing left within him now except the hatred of those who had done this to Vivian, that was it, that was all. Once the last of them had been destroyed, Tyler's time here on earth would come to an end. This anger was essentially what kept him going... once they were all dead, he would have nothing, he would be an empty shell of a man. When that moment came, he would cease to be. His world had been shattered, and once her death was avenged, his own would follow. He didn't really believe in heaven or hell... any belief he had in that sort of thing was destroyed upon the death of his older brother whom had been an avid Christian. Tyler didn't believe that now though...how could there be the loving God Jacob always talked about when good Christians like Jacob were killed like that? No, to Tyler there was nothing after death. Perhaps that was what really pushed him over the edge. Knowing that she died mad at him, and he would never get to tell her he loved her. She was gone, like dust in the wind, she was whisked away before he had the chance to hold her one last time.[/center][/size] |
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Post by Tyler Haze on Mar 12, 2009 3:49:44 GMT -5
Become a better roleplayer
"Hi, I'm Jess. I like horses. Coffee is gross. I start bar fights."
"Well hello there, my name is Jessica Hope ____, but most of you can get away with calling me Jess. You're going to want to get to know that name pretty quickly because well... everyone's saying it these days. I mean really, who isn't saying it these days? I know, you're all like wtf? Vain much? and the answer is, quite simply, yes. But hey, don't look at me like that, if you were me you'd be pretty vain too. You know how it is J stands for Just E stands for Excellent S stands for Shining and S stands for Standard. See? Now you know why it's okay to be vain if you are me, because well... me, as defined above means Just Excellent Shining Standard. Plus... Jess is just one letter short of Jesus sooo... yeah.
Horses are pretty much the essentials of my life. Without them... there would be no Just Excellent Shining Standard, and then what would you all look up to? Anyway, I've always had a thing for horses since I was born basically. I had one of those little horse things on springs, and I was kind of obsessed with it... I wonder where that went... probably got broken by my brother... I sort of didn't ever grow out of it, and for years I would go trail riding with a friend that my parents had sold their horses to several years ago... then we moved, and they moved, and I pretty much didn't get up on the back of a horse for probably a food two years (with the exception of Sindbad, my friend's welsh cob pony). Then, when I was 15, I got an email from the lady who my parents sold our horses to years ago, asking if we wanted to buy our old horses back after 11 years of being apart. So we said HELL YES and a few months later BAM I had two amazing horses in my back pasture.
I don't drink coffee... amazing I know. That stuff stunts your growth apparently... not that I really need to worry about that considering that I have maxed out all my growing and topped the charts at... no, not 5'1" I'm actually 6'3" I just got trapped in a little body... curse genetics. Anyway... I don't drink coffee because I simply cannot understand why anyone would want to imbibe a liquid that essentially tastes like used oil from the engine of an '86 Subaru that has never been changed out... and don't ask my how I know what that tastes like. I don't give a damn how much sugar and creamer or any of that shit you put in there... it's still disgusting.
A matter of dissent has come up regarding me, and I would like to put it to rest. The answer is yes, I do start bar fights on a regular basis. I know I know, you're all like "say what? You drink underage?" and the answer to that is no. I've never even tasted alcohol... unless you consider the thick and suffocating odor of the stuff taste... but see the thing is, you have to be 21 to drink, but out here in the boonies where everybody and their grandma's dog owns a gun, as soon as you hit 18 you're allowed into the thick of the bar. Oh yes, this is where I find my pride and joy... bar fights. It's simple really... just find a guy who's drunk, but can still stand, and punch him. He gets pissed, and looks around for who did it... but honestly, who suspects the cute little 18 year old shorty sitting at the bar next to you? So he looks at the guy next to him and figures it must have been him, so he punches him, then it's like a domino affect and within minutes the entire bar has turned into a brawl. That's the point where you make your exit, because pretty soon the cops are gonna show, and you don't want to be on the scene of the crime. Of course, this is dangerous, and without proper training, you should not partake in suck off the wall and essentially deadly actions."
There you have several examples of just how simple it is to take a three or four word sentence and turn it into a whole paragraph. It's just about the simplest thing you could possibly do. Take an idea, and EXPOUND! Wow... that was tough. You should try it some time... everyone likest to see LONG posts (long being... four paragraphs or more), not short little chinsey ones.
Next up GRAMMAR. oh no...oh yes.
So, roleplaying takes place in THIRD PERSON, meaning I don't want to see the word "I" or "my" or "mine" or any of the first person words show up in your post unless you are quoting your character. We don't want any auto biographies. You need an Example? okay here goes...
"I went to the stable for my riding lesson" NO NO NO NO!!! Do not write that. Here's what we want to see "Jess went to the stable for her riding lesson"
Anyway, posts should also take place in the PAST tense. If your character is talking you say "As Jess was walking, she nearly ran into someone. "Woah sorry dude..." she SAID" none of this "As Jess was walking, she nearly ran into someone. "woah sorry dude..." she says" crap. See, the thing is WAS WALKING is in the past tense, but SAYS is in the present tense. Mixing tenses is a huge resounding NO in the world of writing let me tell you... my English teacher would slap me upside the head if I did that.
Now, onto the DETAILS
We honestly don't want to read this "Jess went into the kitchen. She grabbed a plate. Then she grabbed the bread. Next she went to the fridge and took out the cheese. She put the cheese on the counter and got a knife. Next she cut the cheese into even slices. After that she put the cheese on the bread. Then she got out the pan. She grabbed the PAM and sprayed the pan. She put the bread with the cheese into the pan and put it on the oven. she turned the burner on. She cooked the sandwich. She put the sandwich on the plate and ate it."
WAKE UP!!! See, that's the point... it is so freaking boring people fall asleep while reading it. No one cares about each and every step that goes into making a sandwich because most of us have made them before, and we KNOW how to do it. Now you may have noticed some bold words in there...and the bold ones are the ones that desperately need change. Yes, they are all "she" and the problem is that that word starts most of the sentences. Be freaking creative. I don't care if you have to go into a 30 word description of who she is, but do not use that to start 90% of your sentences... it just sounds and looks bad.
Also, the sentences were short and BORING. I want to see commas semicolons colons ands ifs buts nors fors althoughs even while because... I want coordinating conjunctions gosh darn it! Make your sentences compound, it's not that hard. Here is an example.
"Jess went to the store. She bought bread. She went home." this can easily be transformed into "Jess was out of bread, so she went to the store to buy some... which was easier said than done. After scouring the store for hours, she finally found the bread buried under a large stack of oompa loompas. Even though the bread was squished, she bought it and headed for home."
See how much nicer that was to read? I thought so. Anyway, I do believe that I have exhausted all my brain power for the time being, considering it is 2:45 in the morning and I have been up since... 8 am, meaning in about 5 hours I will have been up for 24 hours straight which is never ever a good thing... so I'm going to turn in. Ta ta for now, and keep checking back, I'm sure I'll have more advice on how to become a better roleplayer soon. [/size] |
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Post by Charlie Parker on Mar 12, 2009 13:34:14 GMT -5
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Post by tanner on Mar 22, 2009 19:54:38 GMT -5
So basically, I am exceedingly bored. I have been home all day doing nothing, and there's only so much nothing a human mind can take so...I have resolved to find something to do...even if it involves going off on a long and lovely excerpt from the erratic mind of the magical me...aka Jess. So, here goes nothing...prepare yourselves for insanity!
Have you ever found yourself asking, if I could be one animal, what would it be? ...................No? Okay then, so maybe I am crazy....but hey, it's WAY more fun than being sane, I can tell you that much. Anyway...I ask myself this question all the time, and although it would be amazingly awesome to be a horse or eagle...that answer is WAY to common, so I decided, if I could be an animal, besides a horse or eagle, what would it be, would be a more appropriate question.
The answer I came to after a long while of debating between just about every animal my mind could possibly cover during this time is a..........wait for it...............wait.....
...............LLAMA! WHOO YEAH! Okay, now you really think I'm insane right? Yeah, that's what I thought. Anyway, to explain my self, I will lay out my reasoning for you.
First of all, llamas are exceedingly ugly. Now, if you were as ugly as a llama as a human, everyone would laugh at you until they died. But, llamas..everyone thinks being ugly as a llama is NORMAL. So? Who cares? Well....I sure do. I mean really...wouldn't it be absolutely awesome to be ugly and get away with it?
Secondly, llamas shamelessly spit on people. I don't know about you guys, but that would be amazing. I mean really, think about someone who you really despise......now think about if you could spit on them whenever you saw them. Yeah, see...that would rock. Don't deny it, you know it's true.
Thirdly, llamas kick some serious butt man. Now, imagine a herd of sheep in the country side. What's always out there with them? A llama. I always used to wonder why on earth a llama would be out rhere. I was like "Can't those farmers tell a sheep from a llama?" but then I found out the llama's there for protection. Sheep, they're dumb. We all know they are. When the big bad wolf comes along the sheep are all like AHHHHHHHH! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES! Only problem is...sheep cannot run for the life of them. I don't know what's wrong with them, they just can't. So old wolfie he's like WHOOO! PARTAY! and goes after the sheep. Sp then, llama man, he goes all crazy ninja on the wolf and kicks his but. You know "everybody was kung foo fighting" type kick butt.
And finally, llamas look like a combination of about a million different animals. Now you're going what on earth are you talking about? Allow me to explain. Think of it this way. llama's have long necks. Giraffe. Llamas have weird legs. Camel. Llamas have long dreadlock type hair. Yak. Now you're like. Okay, you are retarded, that's three...who cares? Hold on, let me finish. This gets complicated, so we'll take it one step at a time.
1. Giraffe: a giraffe has a donkey tail, a snake tongue, and a deer like head.
2. camel: I don't even really know...lets not go into that.
3. yak: yaks have woolly mammoth hair, a buffalo's shoulders/hump on back, a cow face, a horse tail, and goat feet.
Now, add all that together, and a llama could be called a donkey-snake-deer-camel-woolly mammoth-buffalo-cow-horse-goat. Therefore...llamas are a combination of more animals than I ever thought possible.
For these reasons...and possibly others that I will spare you the long narration of...if I could be one animal besides a horse, I would choose a llama. Now ask yourself, what animal would you be? |
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Sydney Montgomery
Junior Member
There comes a time when I can't keep up this fight.
Posts: 73 
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Post by Sydney Montgomery on Apr 5, 2009 18:46:57 GMT -5
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Post by austin on Aug 7, 2009 13:13:28 GMT -5
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Post by austin on Aug 26, 2009 23:54:11 GMT -5
Youtube is a poo head and wouldn't let me upload this video because of the stupid WMG dealio where no one can post any new videos using music since WMG freaking owns every song ever recorded and they block it from being used... so I uploaded it to photobuckt... quality's not great, but it'll do, aye?  |
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Post by Charlie Parker on Oct 21, 2009 18:32:56 GMT -5
Mhmmm... I made another one...
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Post by Charlie Parker on Nov 16, 2009 13:00:22 GMT -5
Become a better roleplayer part 2.
Okay so... once again I have nothing to do and I'm on the verge of being bored to tears... so once again you all get a random exposition on the pet peeves of Jess when it comes to roleplaying.
First things first... memories. Memories are great... it gives the other person a bit of a look into your character's mind and their past... however, we really only need that memory once or twice. When you use the same memory over and over and over it becomes quite obvious to everyone else that it's just a cheap "trick" to meet the word count standards. Seriously. If your person was in a car accident, I don't want the same exact 150 words at the beginning of your post... it's BORING, completely uncreative, and... just don't do it, kay? Since I am the word's police and I see this consistently in your posts I will start giving you word count warnings because I will not count those first 150 words in your total word count. I don't care if its the best 150 words you've ever written, I don't want to see it on every single one of your posts. Got it? Good.
Next we have the ever present agreement issue. This was on my last one too, but people just don't seem to get it. We roleplay in the PAST tense and in THIRD person. You cannot say "I am going to the store" you have to say "she went to the store" or "so and so went to the store" We're not talking about you... you are talking about your character. Mmmkay?
And I just had a brain implosion brought on by hunger and too much heat... so that's all I'm going to say for now... I'm sure I'll find something else to talk about later. Check back eh? [/size] |
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Post by Dustin Kurucz on Jan 6, 2010 1:27:34 GMT -5
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Post by Dustin Kurucz on Jan 16, 2010 18:21:20 GMT -5
And...   |
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