{Alessandra} Surprise surprise! {Sebastian}

[Sebastian Kings]

Sebastian

There goes my life,
There goes my future,
My everything,
Might as well kiss it all goodbye....

Sebastian was shaking as he finished telling her the story. His bottom lip trembled as he stared intently inot her hazel eyes with his of the same color. She was angry.... She had every right to be.... Sebastian told himself. He ran a hand through his short dirty blond hair. This was scary, surreal even. He didn't want to be a father, yet he'd never let Alessandra take on his responsibility, or worse yet, let that criminal be his child's father. Chey bit her lip, she was struggling with something. And you knew this? Why didn't you tell me?

[/s] she snapped. Sebastian winced. No! Chey. I just found out, she just showed up today. I swear, I never knew this would happen, not in a million years... he trailed off. Please believe me. Please. I can't do this without you... he begged. He leaned forward, brushing her cheek with his lips. I don't know what I'm going to do... I just don't know. But I know I love you.... And I know you loved me.... We can do this he assured himself We have to he murmured almost inaudibly.

Sebastian's eyes connected with hers, a look of many emotions was exchanged, but mostly hope, hope that they would get thorugh this alive, and together. He turned towards the door of the barn, he had to be sure... He hoped Chey would follow him, and sand beside him through this whole ordeal, but he realized that would be terribly hard for her, and she would probably hate him after this was all over. Striding confidently as he could he tried to put on an illusion of confidence, of courage. But it wasn't easy.... He entered the barn. Alessandra was curled up into a ball, leaning against the wall on the floor. Tyler was next to her. Sebastian passed a look of hatred to Tyler and passed him to see Alessandra. Her eyes held so many feelings and emotions, of course there was anger, directed at Sebastian, for punching her boyfriend in the face. There was broken trust, most likely because he left her without a trace. Along with those there was fear, fear of raising a child he supposed, maybe fear that Sebastian wouldn't want anythig to do with her as he was getting married soon. Sebastian heaved a drawn out sigh.

He bit his lip so hard, he could've drawn blood. This was so hard. his eyes couldn't help but travel back to Tyler. He seethed with anger everytime he saw the younger man, it was strange, as the criminal hadn't really done anything to him personally. Sebastian adverted his eyes and drew his gaze back to Alessandra. He gulped and opened his mouth to speak. At first, no words came, but eventually he managed a few hoarse words Alessandra, he began. I don't know what's going on... Bt I need to know.... he trailed off, realizing that didn't make any sense I need to know that this... kid... is mine.... or someone else's he looked back at Chey and corrected himself We need to know he said more strongly. [/size][/blockquote]

There goes my life.....

[Cheyenne Kings}]

((OOC: ick, still museless...))

Cheyenne}

How the hell did we wind up like this?
Why weren't we able
To see the signs that we missed
And try to turn the tables;
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

It killed Chey to see him like this; struggling, almost shaking. It reminded her too much of his first day back. ”No! Chey. I just found out, she just showed up today. I swear, I never knew this would happen, not in a million years...” Chey sighed, shaking her head and angling herself away from him slightly. She was being immature, she knew that... but she had to take out her hurt on someone. ”Please believe me. Please. I can't do this without you...” He was begging now and it hurt her even worse to see him like this, but she pulled her cheek away coldly as she felt his lips brush it gently. She wasn’t going to give in that easily.

But as she brought her eyes back furiously to his, she felt herself instantly soften at the look of sincerity in his hazel hues. ”I don't know what I'm going to do... I just don't know. But I know I love you.... And I know you loved me....” she froze right there. The use of his past tense stabbed Chey like a knife and she felt hot tears suddenly build up in her eyes. ”I still love you” She whispered under her breath, but she wasn’t sure if he heard her. ”We can do this, we have to” She barely heard him say and her eyes dropped to the ground. She wanted to nod, to take his hand and tell him it would be alright, that she would still love him no matter what, but she couldn’t. Instead she stood there, watching helplessly from the corner of her eye as he slowly walked away.

She drew in a ragged breath once he was no longer in sight, backing up against the wall for support as a single tear rolled down her cheek. She brushed it away angrily. She had to be mature about this. She sighed, rubbing her temples and trying to decide what to do. This was hard, there was no denying that. All the what if’s ran through her head. What if Sebastian wasn’t the father? Or even worse, what if he was? She shuddered, closing her eyes in an attempt to clear her thoughts. When she opened them she shrugged off the wall and quickly followed after where Seb had gone.

Entering the Stable Hall, she saw the girl, Alessandra, curled up against the wall with the stranger’s arm around her. Chey wasn't sure what to think anymore, or even what to feel, so she decided to concentrate on what Sebastian was saying. ” I need to know that this... kid... is mine.... or someone else's” Chey stiffened, but then realized that he turned to her for a moment. ”We need to know” He corrected himself, and Chey waited silently for the answer that would put an end to all the ‘what if’s’. The answer that had the power to change everything...

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Now the story's played out like this
Just like a paperback novel
Lets rewrite an ending that fits
Instead of a hollywood horror;

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[Alex Lovasz]

Well this was just fine and dandy. Alessandra felt like everything had just fallen apart infront of her. First she meets they guy thats the father of her children. Then her ex shows up and punches the other guy. Then she realises that he might be the father. Then his fiance shows up and see everything. Next thing you know Alex and Anthony would show up. With her luck today they probably would. She sighed. Why did this have to turn into sucha a mess. It was supposed to be easy she was supposed to live with Alex and raise her children with just that and then she had to run into tyler. Now if that had been it she would have been able to handle it but no, Sebastian had to also live here. And not only did he just live here he was a trainer and he was engaged to the manager of the barn. And then there was the whole she didn't know which one was the father. It would have been simpler to lie to Seb and say she took the test and Tyler was the father. But she couldn't lie to him. She had never been able to he just always seemed to know.

She sat scrunched up against the stall trying to gain her strength. She knew if she hadn't been pregnant she would have been able to handle it. But now it was like the weight of it all was on her shoulders and she couldn't contain her emotions... She couldn't hold up her strong face anymore. Tyler lowered himself to her and put his hand on hers and the other around her shoulder. She released a deep breath and sunk into his arms. His touch was rough but...reasuring to her it was comforting securing. She felt safe with him. She wasn't sure why but he just felt right. Most girls would have been scared of him because of his record... Or blocked him out like the rest of the world. But she wasn't like that. Everyone needs a second chance and she was just the person to give that to Tyler. She was going to do her best to be there for him. She wouldn't leave him.

His words hit her, he had a different sense about him he was no longer rough and hard hearted. His voice changed slightly and she could tell he wasn't putting up any defense anymore. Don't say that.... I deserved it. She closed her eyes her brow furrowed. How could he say that. "Tyler don't. No one deserves this... that." She leaned into him and kissed him on the cheek. "I screwed this up...." She took a deep breath. "And now i need to fix it." She leaned her head back and it hit the stall wall with a thud. She looked up at the clock. The tick tock seemed to ring in her ears. Her vision became blurred as her eyes watered up. What now. How did she explain this how did she tell Sebastian and... the manager the whole story. How did she explain to Tyler that she trusted him and wanted him here how did she exlain to him that she needed him.

These were all to many questions to ask. She was lost and she felt very much alone. She knew they said they would help her. But what did that really mean. She trusted Tyler more then Sebastian. Most would find that obsured but Tyler was drunk when this happened it wasn't really his fault. But sebastian wasn't drunk when he pretended to love her. He wasn't drunk when he left her. He wasn't drunk when he broke her heart. She didn't blame him.. or Tyler for the babies. She blamed herself. And she didn't blame Chey for Sebastian leaving her... Though he probably did leave her because of Chey. But Alessandra wouldn't hold a grudge on Chey simply because of that. Now she would if they kicked Tyler out. That would be low and stupid. This wasn't his fault... It was hers.

Next thing she knew Sebastian was walking down the aisle towards them. She flinched slightly just seeing him. Scared of what was going to happen next. She started shaking and could get it to stop. She didn't know what was going to happen. The future could go so many ways. And most of those ways ended badly. She tried to calm her nerves but she couldn't seem to stop the shaking. She avoided Sebastians gaze at first. Scared that she would let him see how scared she really was. Scared that he would see right through her. See how heart broken she really was. Scared for what had been... and what was to come. Scared that he was going to take her away from Tyler. Scared that he was going to beat Tyler up more. Scared.... Just plain scared.

She stared down at the ground and he said her name. She clenched her eyes tight. So many memories flashed before her. The way he said her name. They way it flowed out of his mouth so smoothly. All the times he came home from work and she would make him dinner. All the time she spent with him. The riding the kisses the hugs the....everything. It was all there in front of her as he said her name. And all she could do was try and ignore what they once had. It was over and she realised that. There was no going back there was no changing what was done. So this is where it all fell apart... crumbled into a million pieces... leaving her in the dark alone fighting for three lives. Fighting for the chance to live a happy life. Fighting for the chance to fix everything.

After only a moment she looked up at him her eyes hiding anything that was once there. All that was left was cold hard eyes shielding her emotions. Now she was strong... she had to be for her own sake and for the babies. He continued and she didn't break her gaze she looked up firmly but the fresh tears that had just fallen showed that she wasn't as strong as she was putting out. "We need to know" That word that simple two letter word killed her. It was true.. all that they had been.. Was no longer. She set her jaw tight. As she let him slowly finish. Once he did so she pushed herself up off the floor and stood before him staring at him dead on. Not angry just a simple strong face. But then just as she spoke she turned to Chey. "I'm sorry this all had to happen i really appologize for the disturbence." She looked back up at Sebastian, to her dismay the hardened expression didn't last long before tears ran down her cheek for the umtillionth time that day. She looked over her shoulder at Tyler then walked to the tack trunk in front of Cadricane's stall. She grabbed her bag out of it and walk back to the group of people. 'Well then i guess we better find out." She tried to smile but it just didn't come out right. She walked out of the barn and to her car.. or rather Alex's car. She despirately wanted Tyler to be the father. She needed to forget about Sebastian and being the mother to his children would kill her.

OOC; Wow i really dislike this post but for some reason i have no muse and this is the best i could come up with. Sorry guys.

[Tyler Haze]

I've never been the kind to ever let my feelings show
And I thought that bein' strong meant never losin' your self-control
But I'm just drunk enough to let got of my pain
To hell with my pride, let it fall like rain
From my eyes
Tonight I wanna cry

Tyler wanted so badly to just make all of this stop. He wanted to go back, and make today never happen. He wasn't ready for a kid...sure things were hell for him before he found out...but now...now everything was changed. Before he had been cold hard Tyler, who was immune to the world. Now though, he was just scared. He couldn't do this...he couldn't have a kid...he couldn't be the role model a child needed...he couldn't...he just plain old couldn't do it. He felt a terrible need to get away, to be alone where no one could see him just in case he totally lost it and broke down, which at this point was very very possible.

He wanted to tell Alessandra that he did deserve it, because he knew he did. He wanted to tell her that it was his fault...if he hadn't gone out and gotten himself drunk...none of this would have happened. He knew what he was like when he was drunk, and yes, he had intentionally gotten himself drunk. That had been only days before his arrest, the night before that he'd shot his best friend because he was drunk...intentionally drunk so he could forget that his parents had just split up officially...How had he managed to screw everything up? What kind of question was that? He knew exactly how he managed to screw everything up.

He was getting the slap in the face that he needed so badly. He was coming to the realization that alcohol never fixed his problems, but it was the problem. Everything that had screwed up his life, he'd done while under the influence. Got his brother killed, shot his friend, knocked up a complete stranger, tried to rob a bank, got shot himself, thrown in jail...it was all caused by alcohol. It hit him suddenly, unexpectedly, and harder than he ever thought possible. This reality check was a cruel one, and left him speechless, disappointed in himself, and feeling like a complete failure.

For the first time since Jacob had died, he just wanted to let it all out...he didn't want to fight it anymore. He didn't think it would be this hard...he didn't think he would ever have to face himself, and now that he was he came to the terrible realization that there really was no one to blame but himself. This whole time he'd shunned the world...he'd shunned them because he was mad. What he didn't know though, was that he was mad at them because it was his fault and not theirs...he didn't want that responsibility...he didn't want the blame...he didn't want reality...he didn't want any of this.

He took a shaky sigh, trying to control himself as he did so. It's the best measure of justice for me. He said with certainty, I needed it. I needed the pain. I needed the guilt. I needed all of it. I needed it...Now all I need is... Damn him! why was this so hard! Why couldn't he just say the word? Why couldn't he let himself say what he needed to? Why was it so easy to say what he had needed and had gotten, yet so difficult to say what he needed now? Why did his life have to be filled with so many unanswered why questions? He had been so certain of everything before, but now he just wasn't sure.

He took a deep breath and was about to say that simple three letter word, I need...He stopped, Sebastian and Chey had returned. The word ran through his mind like it was on a loud speaker, but it didn't exit through his mouth, you. He couldn't say it, not with them there. For the first time, he actually felt shame under someone's glare. Usually he just held their gaze with his emotionless eyes, but now...he couldn't bear it. He felt more guilt weighing against his chest now than he ever had in his life. He didn't move, and he didn't bother to look at any of the three people he was in the company of. All of this was his fault. He'd gotten Alessandra pregnant, that ruined her life and his, and now it was screwing with someone else's "happily ever after." God he just wanted to kill himself, and they were lucky he didn't have a gun, because right there, he might have just ended it.

Then Alessandra seemed to stiffen and stood up as Sebastian finished. He still didn't move for a moment, but as she finished her apology, he rose slowly to his feet...half expecting Sebastian to just knock him back down again. He straightened slowly, but it seemed everything about him had changed in an instant. He didn't look like the strong and untouchable person he had been pretending to be for so many years...he looked just exactly like the broken and confused young man that he really was. He took two steps back from Alessandra in an almost respectful surrender, refusing to look up and meet Sebastian's glances. He was giving up...for the first time in his life, Tyler Haze was backing down, bending under pressure, waving the white flag. He was done with fighting.

Alessandra's next words hit him almost as hard as the ones that had informed him that she was pregnant with his child. Find out...find out...she didn't know? Oh no...no no no no. He couldn't take this...he almost didn't want to know. It was all too much, he couldn't handle it. He stood there, bleeding and broken...unable to react to anything at all anymore, his whole body was numb. As Alessandra walked away towards her car, he shook his head and closed his eyes. This wasn't happening. He turned his back on Sebastian and Chey, putting both hands on the lower half of his horse's stall door. He was trying so hard to regain control of himself, but it was useless. each breath was shallow and caused a slight tremble to run through his body. Finally, he turned the opposite direction as Alessandra, and walked away slowly. He'd let all of them see too much, he'd let them see inside...he was scared, confused, and ridden with more guilt than he could bare. He needed to be alone with himself and his thoughts, he needed to find all the pieces of himself that had just shattered and piece them back together. He knew he had said he would be there for her...and he wanted to be, bit right now...he just couldn't.

So many things he couldn't do. He couldn't handle the truth, he couldn't keep it together, he couldn't bare the guilt, he couldn't be there for her, he couldn't hid from his reality, he couldn't life up to Jacob's expectations, he couldn't keep his promises...he couldn't...he couldn't. Was this God's cruel way of showing him that he was incapable of doing anything himself? As he walked away, his vision blurred slightly, and he felt the cool of a drop of liquid falling slowly down his face. That was the end of his self control, that was the end of his strength, that was the end of everything. He was letting go.


I've never been the kind to ever let my feelings show
And I thought that bein' strong meant never losin' your self-control
But I'm just drunk enough to let got of my pain
To hell with my pride, let it fall like rain
From my eyes
Tonight I wanna cry

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